I am now seeing that this year I have only blogged a handful of times which contradicts last years resolution, to blog more, but thats OK because my 2018 resolution is to demand less from myself so, it's all a wash.
I have been spending the last days of the year contemplating what is next for JSD. Weddings, events and workshops will always be at the core of my pursuits but my thoughts have shifted, or reverted (as they always do) to more existential questions about myself and the universe and of course, flowers. Before starting this business I was a 20 year working six days a week at a restaurant in Malibu, going to school and often described as intense. Should I have been more informed about my educational opportunities I think I might have gone to a liberal arts school and learned more about, everything. Alas, I believe in fate. School wouldn't have been nearly as humbling as starting my own business or getting married young.
Here is where I delve into internal issues and struggles of my year but I deleted that paragraph. By time I got to the end I realized my biggest lesson is boundaries between personal and professional. The gift we can give ourselves of privacy and space for growth without judgment from others and ourselves is indispensable. I am still very much in my 20s, a time I want to embrace and jealously preserve. While recently looking back on an old blog I had in high school all I thought was, no one cares. No one cares about your life like you care about your life. As fleeting acquaintances people will make assertions about you and what they think are sensible conclusions (with limited information) and it can be irreparable. Why do we allow strangers to dictate so much of our personal course? This next year, I am stepping back and zeroing in on my life and my sphere of loved ones. As my incredibly wise business mentor says, "head down and stay the course".